I want to begin by saying that this is my personal opinion of this book and it is based on my deep personal convictions about health, babies, and mothering. If you do not agree with me, that is totally fine. Everyone must form their own inner convictions about this subject. If you have already read this book and lived by it please do not take this personally! I am not trying to make you defensive or angry. I am merely expressing my own opinion of this method of sleep training and if you are interested and open minded enough to listen I am humbled that you are willing to hear me out. Thank you!! This book is really, in a nutshell, a CIO method of sleep training and how to routine/schedule you baby’s every moment of life.
Why I do not like the method of this book and would not recommend it to others:
1. She teaches self soothing and not parent soothing. I can see how self soothing is a good thing, and I am not opposed to the self soothing itself, but I am deeply opposed to it replacing parent soothing. (I realize that she is not saying to NEVER parent sooth, just almost never when it comes to sleep. Only for special reasons. (illness, pain, etc.) My question is “how can you know for absolute certain that there is nothing wrong with your baby when they are crying or awakening?” What about hidden emotional or physical problems? My second question would be “why do we need to make our babies independent so early on?” Shouldn’t they get to be a baby for a while? What is wrong with parent soothing your baby to sleep? I prefer it. I encourage it. I personally want to take advantage of every chance I get to love and cuddle my baby- the first year is gone in a blink. A BLINK!!
2. She has a routine for everything. Routine, routine, routine! Routine for sleep; baby must be trained how, when, and where to sleep. You must stick to the routine. Routine for play; this is your play time when I say it is. Routine for sustenance; you must nurse/feed on a schedule. Babies only “need” to eat a certain amount. And by no means must you night nurse after the newborn stage! This last routine is the biggest kicker for me. I mean come on, what could be more horrible than to nurse your precious baby at night? You would only get to enjoy closer emotional bonding which creates more emotional stability for both of you, quiet peaceful alone time together, relaxing hormones that are released to both of you that will soothe and help you become peaceful and ready for more sleep, and the added bonus that breastfeeding a lot helps to delay ovulation. This is a great, God given, natural way to help with child spacing for those who do not believe in using birth control. To me all of the sleep training, life scheduling seem so domineering and crushing. I do not believe in letting your baby rule the roost, but this is just too much for me. It stresses me out and exhausts me to think about it. And I tend to be Type A; this makes me feel like we are going to Baby Boot Camp. I prefer to enjoy my short Babymoon instead. Another thought is how does all this scheduling affect the other family members as well?
1. What CIO Really means
2. How CIO Sabotages the Parent-Child Relationship
3. Sensitive Sleep Training That Does Work
4. Science Says: CIO May Be Harmful to a Child’s Health
This book is my personal recommendation for baby sleep literature- for what that is worth.The Sears' also have a fabulous website as well: askdrsears.com
4. I also find it quite interesting that the author is not in any way more professionally qualified to be giving out advice on baby sleep that I am. She has a MA in Ed. Big deal- so does my mother! I would rather get advice on baby sleep from pediatricians who have personally conducted scientific research and carefully studied the scientific research of others on the subject of baby sleep, CIO, and how important breastfeeding is for the physical and emotional well being of the baby and mother. I prefer to get my advice from a credible source, ponder it, and then make my decision. And please forgive me for saying this, but I find the biggest irony in all of this to be that most of the people who recommend and follow this book (and others like it) are the same people who will blindly follow (and advise others to do the same) doctor’s advice simply because “they are the professionals and they know what is best for our health”. As if we do not have the mental capacity to learn, know, and understand these things. Not to mention, do we not have an obligation here to know what is being done to our bodies and the bodies of our children through the teachings and medical treatment of these physicians? What I would like to know is why are these people so readily willing to take the advice of a non-professional on the subject of baby sleep and suddenly not the doctor’s? I am not willing to risk damaging my baby physically or emotionally just for a little sleep. You can always sleep later, but you can only take care of your baby now. I hope this has not sounded like I was “going off”, but I am so distressed by this teaching that I am weary from holding it in.